Thursday, March 08, 2007

Phrases That Need to Go

I consider myself the ultimate authority on all things English, and so should you. I have decided to use this power to protect the language from violation, and will now be banning certain phrases from use.

"Now that's what I call..."

Enough. That's so lame. I don't think there has ever been a time where that setup was funny, but if it was, it was before anyone reading this blog was born.

"That's so random!"

I'm declaring the word "random" to be dead. No more "random." The only instance in which it will be acceptable is in reference to a number generator. If you see a crazy YouTube video, you will not describe it as "random." Feel free to say "unexpected" or "absurd." You don't mean "random." Stop it.

"Rock out with your cock out."

Christ. If ever there was a reason to outlaw rhyming, this is it.


Any talk about society, while not banned, is to be looked down upon, unless it comes from a sociologist. Even then, come on.

This list will never end.

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